Useless Ramble.

I find it harder and harder to wake up with a smile as every day passes, knowing that no matter how much I search for something to fill this hole, I find nothing... just an empty black void in my heart constantly reminding me of its presence. Sometimes I wonder how much longer I can hold up this mask, this mask of happiness, of joy, of mirth, all the positive emotions people want to see. I truly find myself more apt to crying...I thought for a time I lost that ability, I was wrong another thing I was lying to myself about. I really should tell myself to Suck it up and deal with it, cause I should. I don't need to rant about my problems, they don't seem that bad.
After awhile it gets harder, I thought it would be better in college.... it just made me realize even more that I'm really just there if I make myself known, if i'm just there, people forget I'm there. Such a wonderful feeling knowing that all you are is just a shadow. Eh I should be used to it, its nothing new, been that way since the start of junior high, only because being open and trusting got me stabbed in the back. Not to mention every time afterward I tried to be open its just the same bull shit of getting stabbed in the back. And people wonder why i'm not that open about much, some things sure i'll talk about but... no, I don't give out my life story easily, only if you have my trust and even then not very many people have that.
In reality I've mostly been trying to distract myself...which in itself is hard when you can't exactly sit down very much without having to do something. Hence why typing on a keyboard is comforting while I sit in a lecture, I'm more apt to pay attention to what the teacher is saying. Even if it may seem that I'm doing something completely opposite of what I should be doing, multi tasking is such an interesting trait that I hold, even if it does get me in some trouble.
Well... enough of my ranting, I really don't feel like many will read this anyway, just some useless ramble about my existence, bet of luck to the rest of you.

Friday Morning, Tired, Irritable, and Sleep Deprived.

"People with wisdom like yours are mysterious. The people and the planet will at some day be destroyed. Whether the planet's memories exist or not, that is already decided. Assuming that the absolute path you speak of exists. Even so, I think the path to destruction is given to people as a choice"

~Jade Curtiss

So First I'd like to start this off by saying, yes it is early, yes I have neglected to update this, but I'll get better.

So on nights like this, Being Angry Faic and all, I rant. Since it is 1:37 AM as i type this sentance, I can't rant vocally so my keyboard gets the abuse, and it gets put down on paper or well technological web like paper.

Alright first?
I Truly dislike people who are Blatantly Ignorant, Some of them mean well sure. But no. No. No. No.
They fight their side of an arguement so passionately, so one sided, they don't realize every possibility and how easily that they are shot down with logic.
What makes me the most unhappy with them is when logic prevails, they get all butt hurt about it, and try to point out how the one using logic is wrong, using the same idea, the same counter arguement, which in turn is thrust down again.
Some say Ignorance is Bliss....Ignorance does not Equal Bliss, Do not pass go, Do not collect 200 dollars. KTHXBAI!

Topic Two.
Okay, So I love how I've been helping all my friends with their Relationships, while I myself, been gone through a recent break up. It was all fine and dandy, I played with it sure, It was fun.
I decided being me, I'd play on some feelings I've had for a Girl for awhile, Mind you I completely Adore this Girl, she is just amazing in almost every way. ((I Say Almost, cause Well I haven't gotten to know her as well as I could, but We're like Bffz anyway..)) So being me, I played a bit, Screwed something up like my luck preceeds me. and well went on the lay low.
Then one of my Friends, who I've helped out alot, got the one piece of information I needed.
And it wasn't what I wanted to hear, Eh its okay, Not life changing. But it dawned on me.
I'm a Nice guy, I mean people know it, and they come to me for help, and Girls I'm friends with them, but thats all it comes to, they get so used to being friends, some of them pretty close friends, that they decide that nothing more can come of it.
So I Raise this question, as the Rant topic here. Why Is it the Nice guys always get Fucked over?? Tell me this! I would really like to hear!

Moving on. Topic Three
Boredom, Holy Shit, who made it. I'm so sick and tired of sitting in this computer chair Day, after Day, after day, after day. Its Droning. So I decided to sit on my Ps2 and play some games, but that got tiring after awhile. I need to hang with people, My Reflective self needs people to be arround....For Fucks sakes, I need people to hang with, but almost no one Remembers to call KP to tell him when the Party is, Or where we are all meeting. Sure some of my Friends who I love so much ((one being the party stated above.)) Invite me to do things with them. I love it that they do. Its just Some of my other Friends are lacking in that category. I DO EXIST THANKS! I'M NOT DEAD YET!


-Cough- Okay, -Long Sigh- I think that will do it for now....
Now....Really About the Girl who i Just Adore, Sure she says she doesn't think anything will happen more then our Amazing friendship, it doesn't mean I won't give up hope. Just means I could get away with more things then the average person ((I think, I'll find out the line i have but It won't take that long to find))

Well anyway, Past my Obvious rage and tiredness

I'm going to close on a happy note

Love and Peace Everyone!

Saturday Afternoon

Its Saturday...One Event done..Got a Prom out of the way, now Have to do a Band Concert and Two Essays this weekend... oh joy...I may call in sick on Monday.

Lets pose a Question this Day,
"If you have a guy in a row boat in the middle of a football field, how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house?"
The Answer Next Week!

Thats what I'll make Saturday posts... Random question day~!

Well its Time I head out and do stuff
Peace~

P.s.: v- you should so level this up.

Click here to level up my card!

Day II

" King:
This day is call'd the feast of Crispian.
He that outlives this day, and comes safe home,
Will stand a tip-toe when this day is nam'd,
And rouse him at the name of Crispian.
He that shall live this day, and see old age,
Will yearly on the vigil feast his neighbours,
And say 'To-morrow is Saint Crispian.'
Then will he strip his sleeve and show his scars,
And say 'These wounds I had on Crispian's day.'
Old men forget; yet all shall be forgot,
But he'll remember, with advantages,
What feats he did that day. Then shall our names,
Familiar in his mouth as household words-
Harry the King, Bedford and Exeter,
Warwick and Talbot, Salisbury and Gloucester-
Be in their flowing cups freshly rememb'red.
This story shall the good man teach his son;
And Crispin Crispian shall ne'er go by,
From this day to the ending of the world,
But we in it shall be remembered-
We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile,
This day shall gentle his condition;
And gentlemen in England now-a-bed
Shall think themselves accurs'd they were not here,
And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks
That fought with us upon Saint Crispin's day."
~William Shakespeare, 1599

Probably one of my most favorite Speeches in Shakespeare. If your Wondering Yeah, I'm going to try to start Every post of this blog, With a Quote.
School is long, probably longer than long cat...and we all know that long cat is looooooooooong.
I really can't wait til Its over, than I can find a job...oh yes, I get to earn money, mmm money...lets me buy stuffs and what not.

Really School has been most interesting recently, I really hate it how you meet people near the end of the semester when you can't spend as much time with them as you like...it bothers me...but not the people.
This Semester started drab and boring...but than as time went on things got....interesting, Everything exploded and all went back together..it wasn't til two weeks ago did I decide to try to be a Casanova again.
Oh Wow really what was I thinking...a few days ago I had a few girls actually fight over me...that never really happens....it was funny....but doesn't really happen...Though a good thing came from all this. But that good thing is a trade secret...It will most likely be posted at a later date.

Hah Intrigued are we?
Your not going to find out no matter what I'm a quiet person I don't spill the beans..

Alright well thats enough for today I have to go pick up a Tux for Prom.
Catch you all later!

Short sweet and to the point.

"If Money is the Root of All Evil, and the Scriptures tell us Wickedness never was Happiness, doesn't that mean that Money never makes us Happy?"
~Kp 4/26/09

Hey There Everyone, Looks like I'm starting this blog business, Should be fun though.
First off most of you are probably wondering "What the heck is a Musical Engineer?"
Pretty much, Its what I consider what I do, Creating music using whatever I can use...I am a musician by trade, Being a Flute player, and still learning the ways of the Clarinet.
But I picked up something this year, Creating music through Technology, and than that opened my mind to realizing everything around us is music in some form.
If I put my heart to it, I'm sure I could make a living out of this. Might take a bit but hey, courage is the magic that turns dreams into reality.

Introduction time!
I'm Kitten with Pancake /kit-n with pan-keyk/ KP for short /Kay-Pee/
Uh Come this June I should be a High School Graduate, and as I've stated I'm a Musician. I love music all and all. No music means no life.
I also enjoy my time playing Video Games, I won't lie I spend more time on my Computer playing games than watching TV.
Hmm, a small note, I seem to have a way with people, not realizing it, I have a kind of magnetic personality, its fun sometimes, a good way to meet new people.
Also makes most people think i'm strange, Well I am, I can be quite Quirky at times.

Other than thaaat I don't think there is much more to tell...Other than Hope you enjoy reading the Stories of my Life!

Until Next time Folks!